Monday, April 9, 2007
Sunday, April 8, 2007
Sweet Emotion Follow-up
Martin Strel successfully swam the entire Amazon river from source to mouth. Check out his expedition here. Manly indeed.
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
Monday, April 2, 2007
The SEC is for me.
While I may be moving into the heart of the Big 12 at Austin, Texas, you can bet I won't be leaving my SEC sensibilities behind. I grew up a Florida fan, and as I finish up at Auburn I think it would be a good idea to take a look at some of my SEC experiences as I've spent four years at college.- Auburn's astonishing 13-0 season my sophomore year with 4 players going in the first round of the 2005 NFL draft. Come to think of it, that Auburn team was much like Billy Donovan's Florida Basketball team. Cadillac and Ronnie Brown threatened any defensive line with a cutting finesse or brute aggression, while Jason Campbell evolved as one of the most reliable quarterbacks in the division. The lack of a spot in the national championship game confirms for the thousandth time both the absurdity of the BCS system and the prejudice against the Southeastern Conference (and they try to make us feel like we're particularly prejudiced!).
- David Marsh racks up a few more national championships in Auburn swimming and ushers at church.
- The Florida Men's Basketball team coming out of nowhere to take down more established programs to clinch an NCAA tournament title for the SEC, as Billy Donovan leads one of the most developed and deep teams in the nation. Aggressive giants like Noah and Horford shut down the lane while Humphrey and Brewer press opposing shot-makers, and after a short jog down the court reveal that they can attack a team from anywhere on the court.
- The Florida Football team grabbing the National Championship, partially because everyone realizes the ridiculousness that Auburn went 13-0 in the SEC. Auburn, in a process of slight rebuilding and shaken from a close call with LSU, beats UF anyways. Florida still goes on to smoke Ohio State, thus seeding a trend that will develop across the university's athletic program for that year.
- Again, UF's MBB team grabs the national championship, being the first SEC team in over 50 years to repeat a championship while also being the first team to repeat with the original starters from the first year.
The list could go on if I wanted to focus on other teams from the SEC. I could also look at the intense damage most every SEC team does to sports programs from other conferences only to conted within the conference the next week. I could look at how every SEC conference game is as intense as the most heated rivalries of other conferences. I'm no sports historian, or even a sports nut, but lists like these explain why I think I might paint the exterior of my house the wonderful yellow and blue of our fine Southeastern Conference.
Correction on Part I
When I said in my Part I to throw all cargo pants in a fire, I mean capri pants. I love cargos, I hate capris. Sorry for the confusion. Part III is coming soon.
What Women Wear...Part II.
Talking about fashion on Cut the Chatter? How unmanly! Wrong. This is sweet vengeance for any male whose mother dressed him up in hideous garb for the celebration of Easter Sunday. Most men have been dressed by their mothers, and for those married guys, by their wives for far too long. So I think it's our turn to tell women what to put in their closets, and Chris and I are more than pleased to do so.
Women, in general, make better fashion choices than men. Men generally break fashion rules once a day, and so there aren't many expectations. But when women fall, they fall hard. It hurts, because in these moments you see that sometimes women can't see the forest for the trees, and when women make bad fashion decisions, everyone hurts.
You can express yourself by the way you dress. No matter what you wear (or don't wear) you are expressing something about yourself. I used to think this was a stupid way of thinking about fashion or whatever, but I'm pretty convinced that clothing is a very public means of expressing oneself. So let's look at some of the ridiculous ways girls express themselves.
Some girls are schizophrenic. I've noticed this in my world literature course, which seems to be about a third independent and about two-thirds Greek, at least in terms of fashion. Earlier this semester, when it was cold, girls would walk into class wearing a North Face jacket, jeans, and tennis shoes, obviously suggesting that they are not interested in their appearance that day. No biggie. Incidentally, these same girls have spent time layering makeup, picking out "glamorous" earrings, and fixing their hair. While I'm sure these girls are adept at doing all of these things, I think it must take at least 30 minutes to get it all right. Please. Your clothing is telling me you don't care, but the cake on your face says otherwise. You say you want to take it easy? I don't believe it.
Fashion can be a way to express yourself, but you might want to be sure that you are in fact expressing yourself and not some fashion designer out to make a buck. Every year, many girls at Auburn adopt a new handful of fashion trends. With such a quick turnover, you wonder if people are really expressing themselves or being cogs in a machine. And what does that fashion-machine express? Lets take a look at Ugg boots in Alabama. Obviously winterwear, these heavy slippers are such an aesthetic eyesore that I'm pretty sure they are only intended to be used where snow will cover up their hideous appearance. And in such climes, I am all for their use. But in Alabama? Seriously? I'm from Florida and all I need in the winter is a pair of socks and shoes, and those for only a month. I don't think that Ugg wearers actually look at these shoes and think, "Hey, these look so cute!" so much as "Everyone else has got them, I suppose I should fall in line." And what that says to me is that a girl is so caught up in the fashion whirlpool that she can no longer think for herself. Sure, this paragraph seems a little nasty, but I'll just remind you why it's important to fight fire with fire:
So how do you express yourself through fashion? Step 1: Don't shop at Urban Outfitters. A lot of people seem to think that UO offers an alternative wardrobe that runs counter to traditional fashion trends. The aesthetics seem to be different, but the methods remain the same. UO presents an image of alternative dress while relying on the same pulses of fashion and dress that clothe women so ridiculously as mentioned in this extensive Cut the Chatter exposé. T-shirts for $30, jeans scratched and torn to look like you've actually loved a pair down to its threads. Most UO wearers seem schizophrenic themselves because the prices are so high, but even worse is the UO representative who has a complete wardrobe provided by the company. It isn't really alternative, since people end up representing a different image created by someone else, instead of their own ideas and personality. I remember seeing urban outfitted people in New York City last Sping Break with their iPods. I can only assume that they were listening to real alternative music, like Jet or the Killers.
Chris will be closing out our series on fashion, and I hope you enjoy it. At the core of our frustration is the fact that so many people in their clothing choices have failed to express themselves, and express something usually far more ridiculous than themselves. Dress for yourself, not someone else.
Women, in general, make better fashion choices than men. Men generally break fashion rules once a day, and so there aren't many expectations. But when women fall, they fall hard. It hurts, because in these moments you see that sometimes women can't see the forest for the trees, and when women make bad fashion decisions, everyone hurts.
You can express yourself by the way you dress. No matter what you wear (or don't wear) you are expressing something about yourself. I used to think this was a stupid way of thinking about fashion or whatever, but I'm pretty convinced that clothing is a very public means of expressing oneself. So let's look at some of the ridiculous ways girls express themselves.
Some girls are schizophrenic. I've noticed this in my world literature course, which seems to be about a third independent and about two-thirds Greek, at least in terms of fashion. Earlier this semester, when it was cold, girls would walk into class wearing a North Face jacket, jeans, and tennis shoes, obviously suggesting that they are not interested in their appearance that day. No biggie. Incidentally, these same girls have spent time layering makeup, picking out "glamorous" earrings, and fixing their hair. While I'm sure these girls are adept at doing all of these things, I think it must take at least 30 minutes to get it all right. Please. Your clothing is telling me you don't care, but the cake on your face says otherwise. You say you want to take it easy? I don't believe it.
Fashion can be a way to express yourself, but you might want to be sure that you are in fact expressing yourself and not some fashion designer out to make a buck. Every year, many girls at Auburn adopt a new handful of fashion trends. With such a quick turnover, you wonder if people are really expressing themselves or being cogs in a machine. And what does that fashion-machine express? Lets take a look at Ugg boots in Alabama. Obviously winterwear, these heavy slippers are such an aesthetic eyesore that I'm pretty sure they are only intended to be used where snow will cover up their hideous appearance. And in such climes, I am all for their use. But in Alabama? Seriously? I'm from Florida and all I need in the winter is a pair of socks and shoes, and those for only a month. I don't think that Ugg wearers actually look at these shoes and think, "Hey, these look so cute!" so much as "Everyone else has got them, I suppose I should fall in line." And what that says to me is that a girl is so caught up in the fashion whirlpool that she can no longer think for herself. Sure, this paragraph seems a little nasty, but I'll just remind you why it's important to fight fire with fire:
So how do you express yourself through fashion? Step 1: Don't shop at Urban Outfitters. A lot of people seem to think that UO offers an alternative wardrobe that runs counter to traditional fashion trends. The aesthetics seem to be different, but the methods remain the same. UO presents an image of alternative dress while relying on the same pulses of fashion and dress that clothe women so ridiculously as mentioned in this extensive Cut the Chatter exposé. T-shirts for $30, jeans scratched and torn to look like you've actually loved a pair down to its threads. Most UO wearers seem schizophrenic themselves because the prices are so high, but even worse is the UO representative who has a complete wardrobe provided by the company. It isn't really alternative, since people end up representing a different image created by someone else, instead of their own ideas and personality. I remember seeing urban outfitted people in New York City last Sping Break with their iPods. I can only assume that they were listening to real alternative music, like Jet or the Killers.
Chris will be closing out our series on fashion, and I hope you enjoy it. At the core of our frustration is the fact that so many people in their clothing choices have failed to express themselves, and express something usually far more ridiculous than themselves. Dress for yourself, not someone else.
Sunday, April 1, 2007
What Women Wear...Part I.
Get excited, guys, the time has finally come. It's time to inform our girls on the thoughts we have on the clothes they wear. Now, I've probably already pissed off any girl that happens to read this. All I can say is that this is simply my opinion, and is not shared by all guys out there. (probably 96%, but whatever) And yes, I am completely aware that you're not trying to impress guys with every piece of clothing you put on. I completely understand that. We'll simply be discussing the outfit choices that obviously took some time to get ready. I am also aware that some girls can look good in anything. My final preface to this topic is that all girls are different. I know this. Height, build, skin tone, and even attitude can and do play major roles in our thoughts. (which I'm not saying you should care about)
We're gonna start with the obvious: shoes. Heels with jeans is not cool. I know it lengthens your legs and makes you a little taller, but we're just not digging it. I feel like some skin needs to be shown when wearing heels, even if it's just to mid-calf. There is, however, a limit to skin shown. Heels + short skirts = a bit scandalous. Heels are best worn with long to medium-length skirts. I'm not sure what they're called, but I'm also not a big fan of those heels that have ties that go around your ankle pretty high. Maybe it's just because it's new, but I don't like them. Shoes are obviously not my strong point, so I'll wrap this up. Flat shoes are the way to go. It doesn't matter if you're short. It's cool, we're ok with that. Just keep it simple, sandals are great. Make your shoes match your personality, and get something comfortable. All shoes really do is enhance your clothes, which I'm about to get into.
Pants have come along way these past few years, and I hate it! Honestly, if it was up to me, yall could wear jeans everywhere. You can, however, choose incorrectly on your jeans. Now I know there are is a ridiculous amount of styles of jeans, and it's hard to find a pair that fits right. I don't understand why women's jeans come in one number sizes. It doesn't make sense. No wonder it's so hard to find a pair. I mean, you find a pair that fits your body, but they're too long or short. They just assume that if you wear a 10 then you're taller than someone who wears a 8, which is obviously not always true. You buy the jeans that are just a little too long and get them hemmed, which is just a pain in the ass. With that being said, here's what I think you should consider when shopping for jeans. First of all, jeans that are too loose look weird. I'm not saying you should use pliers to put them on, they're just not made to be worn all baggy like that. It messes up your whole look. You don't see much of this, so if you think they're tight enough, they probably are. You should also consider how high on the hip they come. This is VERY different from girl to girl. Too high is no good, and too low is skanky. There is a happy-medium on every girl. I would say right at the hip bone is a good aiming point. As far as wide-bottom leg thing goes, I'm a fan of either. Colors are important as well. I feel like darker jeans are a bit more formal, and lighter jeans are for every day wear. I will touch on this subject with more detail in Part III of this series.
My personal favorite for girls pants is cargo-pants. I don't know why, I just love them. They have that casual "I don't care" look, yet they look good with a number of tops. That's just a personal thing, so I'll move on. Cargo-pants should all be thrown into a fire. Again, this is simply my opinion. I'm sure there are guys out there that like them, I just haven't met one. I don't mind them nearly as much now as I did when they first came out, so that's good. If you must wear cargos, don't wear jean cargos. Atleast wear some cacky ones or navy or whatever. Just don't wear jean cargo pants. I think half the battle of making capris look decent is the shoe you wear with them. I'll touch on this later. Maybe they'll grow on me over time, we'll see. Some trends, like these flowing ankle-length skirts that look like they have Indian symbols on them, I hated at first. They're actually kind of growing on me though. I think it's a classy throw-back look that when done correctly, can look pretty damn good. Again, we come back to shoes. Some sort of flat shoe must be worn with these skirts. I've seen girls wear high heels with them. They contradict each other, and it looks stupid. Moving on...skirts are actually quite simple, the shorter the better! ...............Haha, just kidding. Too short is trashy and quite unappealing. Anywhere from knee-length to moderate length is great. I personally like cacky skirts with a casual shirt. Any color skirt works though, it's all about the fit. Again, I am merely scratching the surface tonight. I'm going to elaborate much more on the topics I've already mentioned, and get into several others in Part III. It will include tops (all of them), make-up, and the ever-so-popular hair styles of today. My co-author, Daniel Pope, will be delivering Part II very soon. Sorry if I pissed anyone off, but not really.
We're gonna start with the obvious: shoes. Heels with jeans is not cool. I know it lengthens your legs and makes you a little taller, but we're just not digging it. I feel like some skin needs to be shown when wearing heels, even if it's just to mid-calf. There is, however, a limit to skin shown. Heels + short skirts = a bit scandalous. Heels are best worn with long to medium-length skirts. I'm not sure what they're called, but I'm also not a big fan of those heels that have ties that go around your ankle pretty high. Maybe it's just because it's new, but I don't like them. Shoes are obviously not my strong point, so I'll wrap this up. Flat shoes are the way to go. It doesn't matter if you're short. It's cool, we're ok with that. Just keep it simple, sandals are great. Make your shoes match your personality, and get something comfortable. All shoes really do is enhance your clothes, which I'm about to get into.
Pants have come along way these past few years, and I hate it! Honestly, if it was up to me, yall could wear jeans everywhere. You can, however, choose incorrectly on your jeans. Now I know there are is a ridiculous amount of styles of jeans, and it's hard to find a pair that fits right. I don't understand why women's jeans come in one number sizes. It doesn't make sense. No wonder it's so hard to find a pair. I mean, you find a pair that fits your body, but they're too long or short. They just assume that if you wear a 10 then you're taller than someone who wears a 8, which is obviously not always true. You buy the jeans that are just a little too long and get them hemmed, which is just a pain in the ass. With that being said, here's what I think you should consider when shopping for jeans. First of all, jeans that are too loose look weird. I'm not saying you should use pliers to put them on, they're just not made to be worn all baggy like that. It messes up your whole look. You don't see much of this, so if you think they're tight enough, they probably are. You should also consider how high on the hip they come. This is VERY different from girl to girl. Too high is no good, and too low is skanky. There is a happy-medium on every girl. I would say right at the hip bone is a good aiming point. As far as wide-bottom leg thing goes, I'm a fan of either. Colors are important as well. I feel like darker jeans are a bit more formal, and lighter jeans are for every day wear. I will touch on this subject with more detail in Part III of this series.
My personal favorite for girls pants is cargo-pants. I don't know why, I just love them. They have that casual "I don't care" look, yet they look good with a number of tops. That's just a personal thing, so I'll move on. Cargo-pants should all be thrown into a fire. Again, this is simply my opinion. I'm sure there are guys out there that like them, I just haven't met one. I don't mind them nearly as much now as I did when they first came out, so that's good. If you must wear cargos, don't wear jean cargos. Atleast wear some cacky ones or navy or whatever. Just don't wear jean cargo pants. I think half the battle of making capris look decent is the shoe you wear with them. I'll touch on this later. Maybe they'll grow on me over time, we'll see. Some trends, like these flowing ankle-length skirts that look like they have Indian symbols on them, I hated at first. They're actually kind of growing on me though. I think it's a classy throw-back look that when done correctly, can look pretty damn good. Again, we come back to shoes. Some sort of flat shoe must be worn with these skirts. I've seen girls wear high heels with them. They contradict each other, and it looks stupid. Moving on...skirts are actually quite simple, the shorter the better! ...............Haha, just kidding. Too short is trashy and quite unappealing. Anywhere from knee-length to moderate length is great. I personally like cacky skirts with a casual shirt. Any color skirt works though, it's all about the fit. Again, I am merely scratching the surface tonight. I'm going to elaborate much more on the topics I've already mentioned, and get into several others in Part III. It will include tops (all of them), make-up, and the ever-so-popular hair styles of today. My co-author, Daniel Pope, will be delivering Part II very soon. Sorry if I pissed anyone off, but not really.
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